It seems as though time has just been slipping away lately. I thought that things would settle down some after the guardian/conservator hearing. Not so. For every bill or account that I have to deal with, there is a series of faxes, emails, phone calls, etc. Nothing is ever just a simple phone call or signing a form. I understand having "legal" folks look over my qualifications. Some of these places seriously function in the day of Bedrock and the lady answering the phone is either Wilma or Betty. I am convinced they chizzle my information onto a tablet. Everytime I call, its like I am starting over. Two steps forward, 3 steps back. It is a major accomplishment when I can "write off" an account or policy as resolved and file it away. And when all else fails, like today, I get out my "big gun" and exclaim, "You'll hear from my lawyer!" LOL. I know these "business things" need to be handled and I am getting it done thoroughly. Yet, I think about today, and earlier this week, and even all of last week...it's all a blur. Sure, I am getting things in order, but I have to admit, I question the value of all of this work. James & Etta don't care if they have bad credit or if their phone bill was paid on time. And yet, I have found myself running around like a chicken with its head cut off (words of my wise father) trying to tie it all together. The cost? My visits with James and Etta remain consistent and almost daily. My time with them, however, hasn't been what I want it to be. I find myself running in to fix this, pay that, drop stuff off, etc. I want to enjoy my grandparents and am hoping that this flood of activity demanding my attention will soon subside so that I can. I realize this mess didn't happen over night and it won't get cleaned up over night, but I sure am pushing hard to get it done.
Even writing this journal is convicting. I think of the time Jesus made a visit to Mary and Martha. In an attempt to be the "hostess with the mostest", Martha ran around making sure everything was just perfect. In doing so, she didn't get to fully engage herself with Jesus. She missed out on so much by being preoccupied with the details. Mary, however, had her priorities straight! She didn't concern herself with trivial matters and instead chose to relish in the presense of Christ. Nothing else mattered but spending time with Jesus. It is the desire of my heart to be more like Mary...to tend to my grandparents business affairs but to keep that "go get 'em tiger" attitude in check. It is hard to have that Mary heart in this busy Martha world.
Tomorrow is a new day. Before the world begins pecking at me with all there is to do, I am going to visit my grandparents and put aside all that awaits me. The "business" will still there waiting...but we can never be sure how long people will be. I started this journal feeling worn out. I find myself closing this entry with optimism and focus. Thanks, Mary.
Even writing this journal is convicting. I think of the time Jesus made a visit to Mary and Martha. In an attempt to be the "hostess with the mostest", Martha ran around making sure everything was just perfect. In doing so, she didn't get to fully engage herself with Jesus. She missed out on so much by being preoccupied with the details. Mary, however, had her priorities straight! She didn't concern herself with trivial matters and instead chose to relish in the presense of Christ. Nothing else mattered but spending time with Jesus. It is the desire of my heart to be more like Mary...to tend to my grandparents business affairs but to keep that "go get 'em tiger" attitude in check. It is hard to have that Mary heart in this busy Martha world.
Tomorrow is a new day. Before the world begins pecking at me with all there is to do, I am going to visit my grandparents and put aside all that awaits me. The "business" will still there waiting...but we can never be sure how long people will be. I started this journal feeling worn out. I find myself closing this entry with optimism and focus. Thanks, Mary.